IF and the City

I used to feel sad when I watched the episodes with Charlotte failing over and over again while trying to get pregnant. Little did I know that my own attempts would lead me on the same sad journey. We've now passed 4 years in the trenches. 6 failed IVF/ICSI cycles = nothing. Time for something new - donor eggs. Success at last. Now for round 2.

Monday, January 29, 2007

27 Days +Ve

We're now week 8 (of our 40ww).

One week to go before our next scan.

I continue to hope that everything will go well, that it won’t all be taken away. I'm still too scared to be happy. How sad.

For Mr. S – seeing was believing. He saw a little creature with a big beating heart so now tells me I have nothing to worry about.

‘You’re not still worried are you?’
‘Yes, but I’m trying not to, I know that if this is meant to be it will be.’
‘But, you must be worried less than before?’
‘Yeah I guess so’.

No I’m not, I'm just as worried as before, but the day after our scan Mr. S had to go to America, so these conversations are happening on the phone. He hasn’t gone for business, but family reasons, a close relative was seriously ill and has since passed away. He got there in time to say goodbye and will stay a few days after the funeral.

I certainly felt the pressure for the scan to be good!

The doc said it would be okay for me to travel, but recommended support hose, drinking lots of water, and being one of those annoying people that roam around and around the plane (to prevent blood clots!)

I decided that I didn’t want to put anymore pressure on myself, so stayed home.

I don’t mind, with the house empty, I don’t have to keep pretending I’m not worrying about anything ...

I would appear to be someone that experiences only mild ‘p’ symptoms, I’m extremely tired and hate how often I have to go to the loo, but have not had my head down the toilet bowl. I seem to experience nausea only when I smell something really strong or I’m hungry. My symptoms also come and go, so because that’s happened from the beginning, it’s not freaking me out the way it used to. It doesn’t surprise me that I’m like this – I never really had any reaction to all the hormonal drugs I took when cycling either.

Of course I know all these symptoms could be related to the hormonal support drugs I still take ...

Did I mention I’m still seeing the kinesiologist? I know I haven't, but the thing is, I’ve done abit of an about turn on that, I still don’t really understand it, but I’m finding it a great help. I’m hesitant to write it up (superstitious), but if all goes well with the scan next week I might ...


At January 29, 2007 12:51 pm , Anonymous margo said...

I am so happy that things are going so well for you. It is normal to be nervous, but I hope that it starts to fade away as your pregnancy progresses.

At January 29, 2007 9:22 pm , Blogger Thalia said...

I'm keeping everything crossed for you, my friend. Hoping very hard it all keeps on going this well.

At January 30, 2007 5:42 am , Blogger Lut C. said...

Some days, I wish I were a man.
PG = problem solved = all worries gone. If only it were that simple!

Your worries are always welcome here. :-)

Meanwhile, I'm hoping none of them come to pass. Not one!

At January 30, 2007 1:21 pm , Blogger KikayC said...

well, pregnancy is so hard to read. During the first tri, my symptoms were sometimes so bad that I couldn't even get up from the bed, sometimes, I feel great which would make me worry. My symptoms eventually faded at 10 weeks. You can't imagine how much I was worried back then. I guess when you've gone thru so much to get pregnant, we always worry right?

You'll be in my prayers.

At January 30, 2007 3:54 pm , Blogger Bumble said...

Hey sparkle, sorry you're still worried, but it's only natural. Men don't understand hey! Anyway, I'm really hoping that everything turns out great. By the way, do you still chat to Star often?

At February 04, 2007 9:17 pm , Blogger simoneclark said...

...Too much wonderment! Keep going Sparkle!


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